White Titan Of Zero
by ZFighter18
Summary: Louise de La Valliere is known as the "Zero" when it comes to magic. Her Familiar was supposed to change that. Supposed to. "STUPID FAMILIAR, PUT ME DOWN NOW!" "Mmm...kay." "NO! PICK ME UP! PICK ME UP!" "Can't hear you, Pinky. A bit louder!" "FAMILIAR!" "I'm pretty sure I have a name, Princess." A story in which Louise summons what she thinks is a noble. "LORD GREY!" "There we go."
1. Prelude: Magic and Mutual Masturbation

Prelude: Magic, Mutants and Mutual Masturbation

Evron Grey stood in the center of a multitude of brightly costumed individuals, all of their eyes firmly pointed directly at him. It was a bright summer day in Armistice City and dozens of heroes had gathered in Liberty Memorial Park to see him leave. Almost a quarter of those heroes attempted to stare him down with angry, bitter expressions, their anger borne from the repeated humiliations that he had caused them over the last month but he couldn't care less. They were dicks to him and he responded to their impolite treatment of his person by being a bigger dick to them, which then prompted them to be even bigger dicks toward him. It was an unforgiving cycle of superdickery.

On the fringes of the gathering, hundreds of civilians had halted their daily activities, eager to see what could have prompted such a large group of their beloved heroes to assemble in the middle of a public park. When they noticed him, there were more than a few gasps at the sight of his pale face. After all, less than a week ago he was still Public Enemy # 1.

He turned around to face each of the heroes in turn, running a hand through his mop of white hair with a sigh, the bored expression on his face infuriating more than a few of them.

It had been a long, long, loooooooong month since had been stuck here on this ridiculous alternate Earth and he was all too glad for it to be over. Stranded on an another alternate earth, rendered homeless, without money and influence, captured and imprisoned by overzealous heroes who thought he was a villain and forced to fight heroes and villains alike due to a large bounty that his father's counterpart had placed on his head. Even worse were the adversaries that had been all too familiar, alternate versions of his friends and family seeking his capture. The fact that he found some of his friends' alternates ridiculously attractive didn't make it any easier. God, he hated this world.

"So…this is it. I'm leaving…finally. I bet some of you are glad to see me leave," he began.

There were more than a few murmurs of assent at his opening words and he smirked in return.

"Well, good for you because I'm glad to leave too. Some of you are kind of assholes anyway," continued Evron, glancing directly at a few heroes. A caped blonde heroine in a gold and white costume growled at that, her fists clenched in rage. Several people next to her backed away from her as she did so. He couldn't blame them. With her Amazonian figure, she was literally head and shoulders above him and he knew from experience that she could tear apart steel with a twitch.

"Most of you are pretty okay. I didn't really get to know all of you that well but I know your alternates in my reality and they're pretty cool people. I've gotten to know some of you and you're just like my friends at home. Cool, crazy, fun weird people who make great heroes. You let me stay with you after all the…," Evron paused and rolled his eyes, "craziness was over with. You fixed up my costume and we hung out. Also, you didn't try to kill me so…thanks, I guess." Many heroes smiled and nodded. A few cheered. One of them, a twin-tailed girl with bubble-gum pink hair whooped and hollered at the top of her lungs as she did a handstand while a Japanese boy next to her shook his head softly.

"So…time to do the honors." Evron brought out a small device from his jacket pocket and pressed a single button before quickly throwing it to the ground. A few seconds later, the device began to vibrate, emitting a high pitched keening noise that set his teeth on edge. Immediately after, the device split open and an odd blue light radiated from it. The space above the device seemed to distort, twisting and turning until it began to collapse in on itself.

Honestly, the effect that the device caused hurt to look at and Evron took solace in the fact that he wasn't the only one in the group of heroes who turned away from the migraine-inducing sight.

Over a minute passed and the high-pitched noise lowered to a much more acceptable tone and Evron looked up, his eyes widening slightly at the sight in front of him. The distortion had stabilized, creating a ragged rip in space-time that was as tall as he was, twice as wide, and for some odd reason was tinted blue and black.

Evron stepped closer to the portal until he was within arms' reach. 'Almost home.' He reached out an arm to the portal, ready to travel through to another reality that was closer to his own on his path home.

"WAIT!"

Evron stopped, dropping his arm back to his side and turning around to face the crowd again. 'That voice….'

He scanned the crowd for the sound of the voice and he almost flinched as he caught sight of the feminine figure walking towards him.

She was hot, and she knew it. It was evident in her walk, a seductive swerve of the hips with every single step. She was below average height for a woman, at least five inches shorter than he was but she moved like a 5'11" model. Pear-shaped curves and an impressive bust covered by a skin-tight black and blue jumpsuit that somehow seemed to accentuate more than it covered it. Evron's eyes rose up her body and he stared directly at her face, unwilling to show embarrassment at the smirk on her face. She knew he was undressing her with his eyes and she enjoyed it. They both knew that. As Evron stared into her blue eyes that matched his so closely, her smirk widened and she whipped her shoulder-length snow colored hair back.

'God damn it, I'm hot.'

Evron continued to stare at his alternate as she walked towards him slowly, taking her sweet time. She stopped less than two yards away from him and began to speak, twisting her hair with a single finger as she did so. "I can't believe you, Ev. You're just going to leave like that?" she asked with a pout, stomping her foot. "No words of advice for little old me?"

Evron sighed and shook his head. "You do realize that I'm you, right? We're the same person. Anything that I would say is something that you'd already know."

Her pout only increased and she placed a hand on her waist and bent over, giving him a very good view of her cleavage and informing him of the fact that she obviously hated bras as much as he did shirts. Wagging one finger imperiously, she made a dissatisfied sound that would sound more appropriate coming from a five year old. "It's still rude to leave like that. Not even a personal message? Telling me how much fun you had spending time with me. Like, you know, kicking butt, taking names, eating ice cream, breaking each other's bones. You know, like, all that fun stuff!" she ended with a little bounce, causing her unsupported chest to follow her movement.

Evron hated the fact that his eyes followed along with her breasts as they bobbed up and down. And by the mischievous gleam in her eye, he could tell that she obviously knew what she was doing. Sometimes, Evron actually appreciated the little quirks this gender-flipped reality world had. While in his own world, the face he showed his adoring fans and the people who didn't know him closely was that of a dense and somewhat arrogant meathead, she obviously played the part of a vapid ditz. Anyone who seriously bothered to look closely would realize that at least some of their stupidity had to be faked. Otherwise, how could they run a team as well as they did? However, most of their enemies and a good chunk of their allies never bothered to look below the surface. It was a lesson in obfuscating stupidity.

He walked closer to Evra, making sure that his loose jacket was open wide enough that she could get an eyeful of his bare chest, until the two were less than an arm's length apart and returned her cocky smirk. "You want a personal message? Okay, I'm going to make this real personal." Evron turned away to clear his throat and faced his alternate once again, his smile gone. "Here we go…You're an annoying little brat who loves messing with people and acting like an idiot. You go out of your way to rile people up and you love using your body to make people uncomfortable. You only want what you can't have and ignore the people who care about you. You have mommy issues and seem to think the entire world revolves around you and for some insane reason, you think you can fix any reason if you put your mind to it. To sum it all up, you're an insane little asshole with an ego bigger than every single hero here."

As Evron finished, everyone in the entire crowd, hero and civilian alike was frozen in shock at the insults Evron had just spewed and all of them turned to Evra, waiting for her response.

By the second sentence, Evra's smirk had fade. By the third, she was openly scowling. As he finished, her left eye was twitching and she had her mouth open ready to retort. "Well, you-"As soon as she began, Evron had placed a finger on her lips and was openly smirking once more. "Shhhhhhhhhhhh….I wasn't finished. You're all those things and a lot worse and honestly, I love that about you."

"What…"

Her response was echoed by the heroes around her.

Evron's proud smirk changed to a wide, honest smile. "You're me…and I'm all those things and a lot worse. I can't hate myself. I love me and as I said before, you're me, so I love you too."

A resounding "Awww" came from part of the hero audience and most of the civilians.

Evron still wasn't done. "Besides, I've always wondered…If I did it with myself, would that be actual sex or just masturbating? Cause I'm cool either way."

Those "Awwws" quickly dissipated.

With that said, he pulled the shocked Evra in for a close hug, cradling her head. "Listen close," he whispered directly into her ear at super-speed, "certain things haven't happened on your world and I'm not sure they will but listen. If mutants start disappearing all over the place, suspect General Arthuria Carter. Look for Nexus's crystal body. You'll need it. Vienna Mercer is still alive but her body double is keeping her hostage. Kill the double. Don't fight an asshole that can mess with your identity. Just don't."

He pulled away from her and she simply stared up at him with a confused expression on her face. Evron wasn't fooled. He knew she had already memorized everything he had said and was already thinking them over. Super speed was useful after all.

"You're doing a good great job by the way. Bye." He turned around once more only to stop as she grabbed his arm. "Okay, what is it n-mmmmffffphhmmmmmmmm…"

With a quick pull, she had brought his head down and mashed their lips together. With the skill of one who had done this many times before, she shoved her tongue into his mouth and began exploring his mouth. After a slight moment of surprise, Evron reciprocated with his own technique and did the same. After two minutes of what Evron would go on to describe as the oddest make-out session of his entire life, Evra grabbed his butt and gave it a firm squeeze, causing him to jump a little in surprise. With that, she pulled away, a string of saliva still connecting them as they took several heavy breaths.

Gazing up at him with a grin plastered on her face, Evra brushed a lock of hair out of her eyes. "By the way, I do have a boyfriend but I don't think he'd mind me using myself."

"I don't think my girlfriend would mind either," he said, returning her grin. 'Damn, that was good.' And it was indeed. Evron was struck with an odd sense of gratitude towards his friend Craig for the way he had designed his super suits to be both loose and flexible.

"Yeah, it's just too bad you have to go," she said with a self-satisfied grin.

Evron paused, most of his blood still far away from his brain and stared, his mouth open, at his female alternate. "You dirty little tease…"

She giggled and flipped her hair again. "You know you love me."

Evron sighed and shook his head once more, a smile still present on his face. Before Evra could say a single word more, he jumped through the blue warp in space.

"…Huh…That guy actually wasn't that bad…for a giant cocky prick."

Shrugging, she turned around to face the crowd who simply stared at her with their jaws hanging open from the absurdity that they had just witnessed.

"What? Was it something I said?"

* * *

As Evron jumped through the portal, he expected to be bombarded with a kaleidoscopic experience of lights, sounds, and general nausea. That was what these portals were usually like after all. What he didn't expect was to jump through the rip in space-time and be on a rooftop in another world at the same moment.

For a single disorientated moment, he simply thought he had just teleported but he quickly realized that couldn't be it. This reality lacked the constant pressure of Zirin in the air and instead…there was something else. Picking up the portal device that had traveled with him, Evron tried to get a feel for this odd energy that he could feel in the air.

It was lighter…less dense…like comparing water to honey.

Evron stood on the rooftop, trying to figure out what this energy in the air could be. Being free from the constant presence of Zirin was a bit of a mixed bag. As it was now, he felt an odd sense of lightness but also a sense of heaviness as well. Somewhat as if he was on a planet with low gravity and even lower oxygen. It wasn't really uncomfortable, per se, but it left him feeling strange.

Closing his eyes, he tried to grab hold of the lighter energy in the air and manipulate it, in roughly the same way he controlled his own energy. Instead of gathering toward his hand like Zirin, it slipped through his grasp like water.

He opened his eyes, a look of surprise on his face. 'What the hell?'

That same energy had just suddenly spiked in intensity and Evron jerked his head around, trying to find the source of the spike.

'There!'

On the opposite side of the street below, a green portal hung in the air. A portal exactly like the ones Space & Time had opened when they stranded him. 'Home!' His eyes widened as he noticed that same portal was about to be entered by a young Japanese boy with a laptop in his hands, not looking where he was going.

In less than an instant, Evron **_moved._**

He jumped off the building, weaved through traffic, avoided people and placed a single finger on the oblivious kid before jumping into the portal.

Milliseconds passed. Slower than a crawl for him, but it was all that was needed to get the job done.

Saito Hiraiga flew back, thrown by an unseen force and impacted his cranium on the sidewalk, rendering him unconscious.

He would wake up in the hospital a few weeks later with no trace of his injuries and a superhuman physique.

Years down the line everyone would still be wondering where his powers came from. Saito, however, wouldn't care. He was a Sentai Hero, and that was all he cared about.

* * *

As Evron jumped through the portal, he expected to be bombarded with a kaleidoscopic experience of lights, sounds, and general nausea. That was what these portals were usually like after all. What he didn't expect was **PAIN.**

He knew when he had exited the portal due to the fact that he wasn't screaming anymore but he couldn't stop himself from hitting the ground face-first. Excruciating pain tends to do that to you.

He struggled to open his eyes. His body hurt. All his nerves were on fire. His blood might as well be boiling and his brain felt like it was melting in his skull. His head was throbbing, his stomach burned, and worst of all, he felt _weak_.

There was no energy in his body. He felt empty, depleted, almost like someone had sucked all the Zirin out of him with a straw and was drinking it in like a little kid with a juice pouch on a hot day and he was the pouch, and whoever drank him had just thrown him on the ground instead of recycling him properly…or something.

He didn't really know. He wasn't very good with metaphors in times like this.

Evron was lying on the ground, that much he could tell. A grassy field, most likely.

Someone was talking…or a lot of someones…he wasn't really sure.

He could make out sounds…barely…and a shrill voice seemed to be reaching through the fog.

"Prof….can't….iliar!"

"….."

"…look…impossible! ...try again?"

"….Summoning Ritual…contract…familiar."

"…do it."

'What are they even saying? It kinda sounds like French…but not French. Fuck me, where the fuck am I?'

Evron slowly forced his eyes open, ignoring the burning pain the sunlight caused his retinas and stared up at…at a little girl?

A pink haired little girl with a stick in her hand?

She glanced down at him, a look of disdain on her face, and grabbed hold of his face.

Drained as he was, he could barely control his muscles and he was worried he might squish her like a bug if he resisted, so he went limp. After all, she was a little girl and he could barely sense any Zirin from her. What could she do to him anyway?

The little pinkette said a few words in that strange Not-French language of hers and tapped him on the forehead with that weird stick of hers. 'Is she playing a game or something? What the hell is this?'

She closed her eyes, puckered her lips and pulled him in for a kiss.

Evron blinked, surprise evident in his wide blue eyes, as the little girl finished her chaste peck on the lips. Honestly, if he weren't so exhausted and disoriented (as well as worried about killing the little thing accidentally), he would have easily avoided it…or at the least pulled away.

'What was that all about anyway?'

As soon as the thought passed through his mind, a burning pain raced through his body, and the center of that white hot pain was focused on his right hand. It was too much for even his unnatural pain tolerance and blackness overcame his vision.


	2. Chapter 1: Weak, Worthless Familiar

Chapter 1: Weak, Worthless Familiar

It was a beautiful spring day in the magical land of Tristain. To be honest, most days in Tristain were rather beautiful. But then again, what else could you expect from a land truly blessed by the will of the Founder Brimir? Tristain was truly the best of the Founder's Four Kingdoms. That is, if you asked a noble of Tristain. The nobles of Gallia, Romalia, and Albion might beg to differ.

Regardless, it was the first day of spring in Tristain, which meant that in the elite Tristain Academy, it was a truly wonderful day. The day when every student summoned their familiar that would accompany them for the rest of their life using the Springtime Familiar Ritual, the same one created by the Founder himself. To advance in the school, each student, like every student before them, would have to summon a familiar. How could they not? Their magic, guided by the Ritual, ventured through the world and summoned the familiar best suited for the mage, showing the young noble exactly what their elemental skill was. To not summon a familiar...Well, it was almost the same as lacking magic at all. To be like that would mean the mage was little more than a commoner.

There was one student, however, who lacked the talent needed for any form of magic, even minor cantrips. She was Louise Françoise de La Baume Le Blanc de La Vallière, third daughter of the prestigious Duke de Valierre and his duchess, Karin of the "Heavy Wind". Karin, a former Manticore Knight and legendary mage, was truly an army unto herself when it came to magical combat, her mind was as sharp as any and her will...Her will was as strong as steel. Her father, well, her father was pretty up there too, but he was no Karin of the 'Heavy Wind.'

While she had gained her parent's intellect and carried traces of her mother's unbreakable will and self-discipline, Louise lacked skill in any of the Four Elements and thus was known by her classmates as "The Zero". Worthless. Pathetic. A true failure. She had never casted a single spell correctly. The Springtime Familiar Ritual was her last and only chance to prove to everyone that she was not a Zero.

Louise took a deep breath, ignoring the mocking stares of all her classmates as she prepared to cast the single spell that would define the rest of her life. She had never succeed before but that didn't matter.

This was it. This was her chance. Everything led up to this. All she had to do now was cast this one single spell, succeed at summoning a familiar, and she'd be a real mage. She had to succeed. She'd studied for months, forgoing sleep many times. She'd questioned everyone in the academy who had ever casted the spell, yearning to understand the intricacies and details of the Ritual.

But she still felt terrified. Was it enough? Could anything be enough? Was she destined to be a worthless commoner the rest of her life? Would Wardes even want her without magic?

"Miss Vallière. It's your turn," spoke Professor Colbert, in his calm manner.

She stood there, contemplating her existence. Could she do this? She had to! She had to! Even if she didn't summon a dragon, a Salamander, or anything powerful, she had to get something. Even the Headmaster only had a mouse and he was the Headmaster! She couldn't be worthless! She was a Valliere!

"Miss Vallière, please step forward and approach the summoning circle." Colbert spoke again.

With a dramatic flourish, she extended her wand and prepared to speak the words.

A deep breath.

 ** _"_** _My familiar who exists somewhere in the universe…my divine, beautiful, wise, and powerful servant…heed my call. I wish from the very bottom of my heart…answer to my guidance and appear!"_

She felt the raw willpower flowing through her. She'd practiced for months just for this moment. Her words...eloquent. Her wand movements...perfected. Her magic rose to the task.

She cast the spell, her heart rising in the expectation of success. 'It's going to work! It's going to work!'

Nothing happened.

Not even an explosion.

Not even a stupid explosion.

She could already hear the insulting whispers behind her.

 _"Pathetic."_

 _"Well, what do you expect?"_

 _"She's the Zero for a reason."_

 _"Don't be mean. Maybe she summoned air or something."_

 _"You're right. Maybe she isn't such a complete failure."_

 _"Okay, but how is she supposed to seal her familiar contract?"_

 _"I dunno, kiss the air till something happens?"_

Louise felt the tears bubbling up and shut her eyes, forcing herself, no matter what, not to cry. She couldn't let them take what little remained of her pride. She wouldn't let them. Her mother would never forgive her if she embarrassed herself like that. What would her mother say?  
 _  
'A noble is above all others. As such, a noble must control her emotions at all times. Outbursts are for the weak, tantrums for the foolish. To truly stand apart from the commoners, her heart must be as steel, her countenance must be as steel, her will must be steel.'_

Louise opened her eyes, her green orbs icy and cold, backlit by a furious determination. They wanted to laugh at her! They wanted to mock her. To bring her down to their level. She, a Valierre, a family so close to the Crown that she was as far above them as they were a disgraced noble. This would not stand!

She would not give in so easily! She was Louise Françoise de La Baume Le Blanc de La Vallière, third daughter of the Duchess Karin de La Valliere and she would not give up!

This was her right! She was nobility! She would summon the most powerful familiar ever or die trying! She wanted power, she **needed** power! If not for herself, then simply to show everyone that she was not to be trifled with!

More willpower than she had ever channeled before rushed through her and she struggled to control it. She would summon something...she would outdo them all!

Forgoing the extravagant wand motions, she thrust her wand out in front of her.

 ** _"My powerful familiar, my divine, strong, powerful, unstopabble servant, I summon you. I wish from the very depths of my soul…Appear!"_**

With the sound of a thunder crack and a flash of blue light, the ritual circle exploded.

Louise almost screamed in frustration. An explosion always, always...always meant failure. However, unlike other times, the explosion had never happened quite like that.

She waited hopefully for the smoke to dissipate, praying silently to the Founder to allow her to succeed. 'Please, please, please, please, please, please!'

As the smoke cleared, Louise let her wand fall to the side while the class and the Professor finally caught sight of her familiar.

Louise felt like crying once more.

A boy lay on the ground. A shock of white hair was the first thing noticeable about him. His odd clothes were the second.

After a moment of hesitation, Kirche von Zerbst walked over to him and glanced down. "Huh...he's rather cute...for a commoner. Only you, Louise, would end up summoning a commoner...and after all that chanting about power and strength."

Her classmates, emboldened by Kirche's words, joined in. In a few moments, she was inundated with the sound of laughter and jeers, mocking comments interspersed between.

Louise simply stared with an open mouth at the figure that she had summoned.

'A commoner...A commoner...I summoned a commoner.'

"Oh, and look, he has white hair. Isn't that special? Weren't you going to summon something that would put my Flame in his place?" Kirche taunted.

Louise forced herself not to scream at the Germanian girl. In fact, she honestly would have it it wasn't for the Professor.

"Ms. Valliere, you must complete the contract with your familiar," Professor Colbert interrupted, his voice cutting through all the noise from his students. "All of you, cease this nonsense. You are nobility, not fools!"

The class quieted down rather quickly, shocked by the uncharacteristically sharp tone Professor Colbert had used.

"Professor Colbert, I can't have...him as my familiar. He's a commoner."

The professor simply looked at her through his glasses, an almost thoughtful expression on his face. "I'm sorry, Ms. Valliere, but you must."

Louise knew that she just couldn't have a commoner as her familiar. The very idea was an insult to her nobility. "Just look at him He's a commoner. He can barely even stand! This should be impossible! Please, could I please try again?"

Colbert shook his head slowly. "Of course not, you have to honor the Summoning Ritual. Now go on and seal the contract with your familiar."

Louise hung her head and she responded in a despondent voice. "Fine, I'll do it."

As Louise walked towards him, she noticed the commoner opening his bright blue eyes and staring up at her with a confused expression on his face. 'A stupid, worthless commoner as my familiar...I can't believe this.'

With some effort, she grabbed hold of his face and chanted.

"Pentagon of the Five Elements; bless this humble being and make him my familiar." she intoned, carefully drawing a circle in the air with her wand. She reached up and tapped him on the forehead, then leaned in and, standing on the tips of her toes, chastely pecked him on the lips.

Her familiar's eyes widened and less than a moment later, the familiar runes slowly began to inscribe themselves on his hand in a flash of blue light.

A look of pure agony crossed his face and for a moment, Louise felt some pity for the unsuspecting commoner. That moment quickly vanished when he suddenly went limp and his much larger body fell unconscious on top of her.

She could already hear the renewed jeers of her classmates and her face heated up in both embarrassment and anger.

'Weak, Worthless Familiar...what am I going to do?' 


	3. Chapter 2: Learning Languages

Chapter 2: Learning Languages, Talking to Little Girls and Other Activities that Involve Screaming

Evron yawned as he woke up, stretching in an attempt to remove himself from the comfortable embrace of the soft silk sheets of his bed. 'What the hell happened last night?', he thought to himself, a headache already fading. It must have been a powerful headache if he still had it in the morning. 'What did I do?' Scratching his white hair, he wiped the sleep from his eyes and looked up, only to freeze as he took in his surroundings.

'This is not my room.'

His bed did not have a canopy and it certainly wasn't wooden. For a second, he thought he might have fallen asleep in his sister's room, for whatever reason, or maybe...maybe he had spent the night with his little Princess. Although, if he finally had slept with Lia, he doubted he would forget it. Something like that would be seared into his memory. Hot alien sex is something that no man would ever want to forget in his lifetime. Especially with a crazy hot, and occasionally just plain crazy, alien princess. Although, his head did still hurt pretty badly. Was he drinking last night? Could he even get drunk anymore?

His hopes of having spent the night in a coital exchange with his girlfriend were dashed as he noticed the stone walls that made up the room he was in.

'Stone? Who builds with stone? Why am I not in the Guardian Building? Something's wrong! Why...oh, yeah.'

His shoulders slumped as he remembered that he hadn't seen, let alone been in, the Guardian Building in over two months. In fact, he hadn't been in his own reality for at least that long...and it was all the fault of two wannabe villains. 'I'm gonna kill those two when I get my hands on them. I'll show them what a Runner can do when he's pissed. Let's see how they deal with super speed friction burns and full power lightning blasts. Throw their fried bodies into deep space and-'

"Ahem!"

Evron's homicidal thoughts of retribution were interrupted by the sound of a high pitched voice clearing their throat off to his right. The sound was obviously fake, designed to get his attention, and he turned his head to see a somewhat familiar pink-haired little girl watching him, with an annoyed expression on her face. She wore clothes that just looked odd...to Evron, at least. A cloak, a badly made white shirt and a skirt? Where in the hell did he end up?

Eyes half lidded, he smacked his lips a couple of times before giving the kid a weak wave. "Hey."

The girl spoke in that same weird not-French language, causing him to raise an eyebrow. "...Yeah, I have no idea what you're saying and you probably don't speak English or French. Sprechen sie deutsch?"

At her confused expression, he sighed. "So...no German either, then. Fucking figures."

Evron leapt out of the bed, which was probably hers, and walked towards the little girl. He was glad that no one had stolen his clothes while he was unconscious. Losing his Freedom Guard designed costume would have pissed him off. Walking towards her, he decided that he needed to find a way to speak to the girl as quickly as possible. He had one in mind, but it wasn't going to be fun for him.

As he approached the girl, he tried to gauge her age. Based on her height; roughly 58 inches, and her slight frame, he would have to guess that she was around ten to twelve years old. At five feet, eight inches, he was over a foot taller than she was and she was well aware of that, having to crane her head upwards to look him in the eye.

"Hey there, little girl. I know you can't understand me but I'm gonna fix that real quickly...okay. Just don't move." With movement that must have been little more than a blur to the child, Evron palmed her forehead and his eyes glowed a bright blue, eliciting a gasp from the child.

She stared at him in shock as he began to curse and spasm, letting go of her head and grabbing his as he fell to his knees in intense pain. He clamped his teeth down on his tongue to prevent himself from screaming, aware that the warm liquid pouring down his throat was his own blood. His head was throbbing, his brain feeling like it wanted to explode out of his head and it was all his fault. He vaguely noticed the little girl shouting at him and giving him looks that were a mix of fear, anger and worry but he paid her no mind. He had to focus, otherwise all this self-inflicted pain would be for no reason.

A few seconds later, his screams stopped and he paused, taking heavy breaths as he tried to stand up. His mind was filled with new words, phrases and best of all, an understanding of the language that the little girl spoke. A language apparently known as Tristanian. The meaning behind many words were missing, but they would be easy enough to figure out as he went along. Despite the pain, things couldn't have gone better. Sometimes, learning languages like that tended to be a bit more messy for him. He didn't need another exploding eyeball situation.

Turning back to the little girl, he gave her another wave with a big smile on his face, showing off his pearly whites. "Sorry about that. Just needed to get your language. Hope I didn't scare you too bad," he finished off with a wink, in an attempt to be as charming as possible.

He expected a few different things to happen as soon as he said that.

He expected her to scream.

He expected her to ask him how he was able to speak her language.

Hell, he even expected her to faint.

Instead, she gained a look of intense horror, and all color dissapeared from her face. Stepping backwards, her knees began to shake, her jaw dropped and a shrill scream came pouring out.

"Y-You're a Noble!"

"What?"


	4. Chapter 3: Magic, why not?

Chapter 3: Magic, why not? _Sure, let's go with that._

"...oh Founder...Mother...disown...commoner...Noble...familiar..."

Evron continued to watch in mild amusement as the little girl rocked back and forth on her bed, constantly muttering to herself. He was amazed she was still going strong, to be honest. Nearly twenty minutes of mumbling and she hadn't snapped out of whatever trance she had fallen into. She had fallen to the floor and started babbling nonsense about Mothers and Familiar and he, being a gentleman and a Grey, had taken it upon himself to lift the girl to her bed and try to unbreak her mind. He had done whatever it took to get her attention; flying around, messing around with lightning, playing with telekinesis. Anything to snap the girl out of her weird trance; you name it and he had tried it. At one point, he had even juggled some blue fireballs and that didn't even seem to faze her. Throwing some ball lightning into the mix had made her pause for a moment only to go into a fetal position and fall back into her nonsensical mumblings, this time emphasizing the word "noble" more. All in all, nearly fifteen minutes of work had accomplished nothing. He did feel rather drained after his little show but he attributed that to his recent travel through the portal. He probably wasn't even close to halfway recharged yet. That probably explained why his muscles still felt somewhat sore.

'Although, I was knocked out for a bit," he paused to glance out the open window, noting the reddish-orange sky. "It's nearly nighttime. I should have at least regained enough Zirin to feel perfectly fine by now. Odd."

"Noble...familiar...Mother...Eleanor...Mother...Noble...familiar...familiar...Noble..."

The little pink-haired girl's voice dragged him away from his thoughts of his own body. Her reaction to his powers was...

Well, hilarious was one word to use for it. Amusing was another. Peculiar was probably the correct term for the situation but he didn't really care that much about linguistics anyway. It was funny so he called it funny.

The way her eyes had bulged when he spoke Tristanian just before her face took on the pinched expression she had moments before she opened her mouth wide to deliver one of the shrillest sentences he had ever heard had been enough for a chuckle on it's own. All of that leading into the way she had swooned to the floor in a manner that was so stereotypically fem it should have been criminal, well...that would have been enough to send anyone into fits of laughter. In short, it had been comical to the extreme. The only thing stopping him from laughing at her was the simple fact that he was trying to make a good impression and avoid being hunted like a criminal...again.

He looked down at the little girl still rocking back a day forth on the bed and had an odd thought.

Immediately jumping on the impulse, he leaned over and poked her in the back.

No response.

He did it again. "Hey little girl..." His tone was somewhat of a whisper, if a whisper was loud enough to be heard from the other side of a room.

He poked her again. "Hey, little girl, your family doesn't happen to be really rich, do they?"

Taking her continued murmurs as a negative, he continued. "OK, that's good. Do they happen to be well connected? Like local government?"

Nothing but murmurs in the same frantic tone that only little girls could pull off without sounding "too" whiney.

"State government? Regional?"

Still nothing but the panicking mewls of a preteen girl.

"Federal government? Country?" Pausing to glance at the stone walls and the somewhat rough but still oddly smooth wooden furniture, he added, "Any friends high up in the...uh...kingdom or empire liable to hold a grudge or put a bounty on my head over some sort of miscommunication?"

The girl rocked back and forth, making no sign that she had even heard him speak. Evron just took her continued noises as a yes. 'Still,' he thought after a moment of silence, 'why did she react like that, though? Wait a minute... What am I talking about? Her reality is obviously still in their version of the Middle Ages. She probably thinks I'm a witch or something.'

Nodding at his accurate deduction, Evron took a moment to give himself a figurative pat on the back only to pause as another contrasting point hit him. 'Wait, why did she call me a noble if she thinks I'm a witch? I assumed witches were burnt at the stake not given titles belonging to royalty.'

Considering the weird way she had screamed after he had spoken to her, she was acquainted with superpowers in some fashion. Why she associated them with royalty was an entirely new mystery.

"You're a noble!" didn't really make sense given the context. Were all superhumans in this world given titles? That was a definite possibility given how superstitious ancient societies were. People with special powers would probably seem like they were blessed by their deity. Or maybe...

'Maybe the people on this planet evolved like Lia`s species! Advanced powers appearing in a few genetic lines allowing them to subjugate and rule over the weaker people! It's another species just like the Kherans...Korathians? Kherathians? Whatever. Lia never really specified their name anyway.' Evron smiled as he came to a conclusion that actually made sense.

"Familiar...Mother...familiar...oh dear Founder..."

He looked down again as the little girl's pitch rose again, edging into the shrill tone that she began with.

'Although, I won't know how right I am until I have someone to ask. Seeing as this little girl is the only person that actually has reason to speak with me, I probably should wake her up...somehow. I guess I do have one option left.'

His face twisted into a slight frown and he fingered the choker around his neck, his thin pale digits lingering on the large blue gem resting on his Adam's Apple. "Sorry about this, little girl. I need answers."

Tapping the strap at the back of his neck, the choker undid itself and fell into his other hand, the gem losing it's blue glow and fading to a pale green.

He lowered himself onto the bed and laid next to her, close enough that the breath from his mouth made her long pink hair ripple softly.

'Subtle, Ev. Be real subtle. You don't want to break her mind or make her an Agent. Just ease her out of this.'

He took a deep breath. "Hey t _here, little girl. You okay there? I'm just s_ _i_ _tting here, kinda bored._ _"_

He paused, watching the girl as her rocking began to slow.

'Okay, that's good. Keep going.'

" _I've been trying to calm you do_ _wn for a while now. It really hasn't been working. Do you mind giving m_ _e a little help?_ " He sat up as her rocking slowed down to a crawl. Despite the fact that she was no longer bobbing back and forth like a mental patient, she still remained in the same position, huddled up with her arms around her knees. Her mouth was still moving, quietly forming the words that she had been muttering for nearly half an hour.

'Okay. Just one little push.' Evron calmed himself, taking in a deep breath. He needed to really focus for this last mental prodding. Too light and she wouldn't react but too hard and she might as well be a puppet. "Now, I'm gonna need you to do something for me, okay? Can you do it?"

Her mouth hung open, frozen mid-sentence and she turned her body to face him, staring at him with the blank eyes of someone under his thrall. She nodded slowly, the movement taking much longer than a simple raising and lowering of the head really should.

" ** _Okay, then_** ** _._** ** _Wake up_** ** _._** "

No sooner had he said the words than the girl blinked rapidly, her eyelids fluttering as if something was caught in them. She shook her head and looked up at Evron, her slackjawed expression fading away as the shock and fear she previously had slid back onto her face. "You're a Noble!"

Evron stood up rapidly and shot a question back at her before she could fall back into her shock-induced trance once more. "A noble? What does that actually mean? What do you mean by noble?"

The girl blinked again, more shocked by his question than the fact that he was apparently a "noble". "Wha...what do _you_ mean? You're a noble! What you just did...Only a noble could do such a thing! You have to be nobility!"

He raised an eyebrow at the girl. "Do you not know how to answer a question?"

"W-well of course, I do! What sort of question is that to ask of a Valliere?" She stood up on the bed in a huff, hands on her hips, and glared down at him. The expression on her face was one of annoyance mixed with a tad of nervousness, almost the same thing you'd expect to see on an angry squirrel. He glanced up at her with half-lidded eyes and slowly floated upwards until he was looking down at her once again.

Running a hand through his hair in frustration, he shot a look of mild frustration at the girl. "What I'm saying, little girl," he noticed her flinch at his tone, "is that I asked you a simple question. That question was 'what exactly do you mean by noble?'. Instead of answering me, you replied with a question. I asked for a simple definition. What I did not ask for was another question. I'm going to ask again and I expect an answer." He narrowed his eyes and the girl took a step back, nearly stumbling as her foot almost sank into the voluminous mattress. "My question is, and I repeat, what exactly do you mean by noble?"

Instead of immediately answering, the girl glanced up at him with a conflicted expression. He noticed her eyes lingering on his feet, as if trying to burn the fact that he was floating into her memory. Her expression soured as she simply stood there in silence until she was left with an even stranger expression on her face accompanied with a pursing of her lips, leaving her looking as if she was suffering from a severe case of constipation. All in all, she looked confused as to how to answer his question.

Evron couldn't imagine why this was taking so long. All he was asking for was a definition. He didn't understand the big deal about it. "Well, I'm waiting."

The girl glanced up at him once again and opened her mouth to speak...only to close it again. "How...What...but...you're...fine." She took a breath as if to steady herself and looked up at him once again. "A noble is...A noble is one who is held above all others with the glorious gift the Founder, in all his infinite wisdom, has bestowed upon him...or her. With this gift, they are held as superior over the commoners and with pure heart and benevolent will, they are to lead those poor souls lacking in the blessing that the great Brimir has bestowed upon his chosen few."

She let out another breath. "That is what it means to be a noble."

Evron tilted his head and stared at the girl in front of him, his brow furrowed in thought. This was just like like he had expected. They see superpowers as a divine gift and essentially elevate those who have them. Still though, the way she had phrased that. Something...something was off there. The word 'gift' in that connotation and with that sort of reverence...didn't seem right. Straightening his head, he asked, "And what is this "gift" that the...Founder has bestowed upon you?"

She made that expression again, pursing her lips and squinting her eyes a bit. Her eyes once again went down to his floating feet and back up in confusion. Throwing her hands up in the air, she gave a loud huff and shouted out, "Well, magic, of course! What else would it be?"

This time it was Evron's turn to blink. 'Magic? Magic? Seriously, magic? I thought I was just amusing myself with the witch comment but seriously? Fucking magic?' A peal of laughter burst from his lips and the girl jumped back, falling down on her mattress ungracefully. That was his fault, really. His laughter tended to be a bit on the manic side but seriously, who could blame him in this situation?

Magic, though. These primitives and their fucking 'magic'. It was just too much. Sure, vampires and werewolves were real but that was just genetic engineering. He knew that it wasn't their fault there were lacking scientific knowledge but he just couldn't help it. The thought that people actually believed in magic slayed him.

He doubted that they could barely do anything with their powers. At most, they were probably limited to lifting books or lighting candles if they tried hard enough. 'Gift the Founder bestowed? As if?' He kept on laughing as his mind kept him occupied with what the people thought were glorious gifts. Maybe they could actually boil water with some mild pyrokinesis, possibly. Their strongest man could probably lift a cow, if he was lucky. Maybe he could take an arrow to the knee without bleeding out, too. Laughter just kept pouring out and he couldn't do much to stop it and he really didn't want to. 'Oh my god, fucking primitives and their magic. Oh my god, they kill me.'

The girl didn't seem to be all that happy that she wasn't privy to the joke. At least, he assumed so from the way she jumped up on the bed and puffed up her cheeks like a little chipmunk. It was rather cute and the fact that she obviously intended it to be an intimidating display only made him laugh harder. "Oh my god, your cute little face...like a little chipmunk."

That same face reddened until she resembled a tomato more than she did a chipmunk and her green eyes flashed angrily as he continued to laugh. She stepped closer to him, wobbling slightly on the mattress with each unsteady step and placed her hands on her hips once again. "What in the Founder's name is so funny? You dare to mock a Valliere? I don't care if you are a noble. I will not stand for this!" She stretched a finger out imperiously, another attempt to intimidate coming off as cute. She was a little kid playing at adulthood. What else could you call that?

He broke out in laughter again and bobbed up and down in midair as he continued to cackle. Glancing down at her feet and the way she barely managed to stand on her mattress, he barely managed a retort through his hysterics. "You're barely standing as it is, little girl."

If it was somehow possible, the red in her cheeks deepened and he laughed even more at her embarrassment.

"Aaarghh! Shut up! I command it!" She let out a scream of barely repressed rage, pulling out some kind of smooth stick and pointing it in his face.

Evron paused his laughter and looked down his nose at the smooth piece of wood the girl held in her dainty fingers. 'oh my god...It couldn't be...'

"Is that...oh my god...Is that really your magic wand?" he asked in a hushed tone, his voice giving off a feeling of awe at the sight of what she held.

The girl blinked and seemed to forget her anger, looking down at the stick she held. "Well, yes. Yes, it is. I've had it for years now." She puffed up her little chest and actually seemed to be beaming as she held up the stick. The way her voice had swelled with pride as she proclaimed the stick her own had pushed Evron over the limit and more mad peals of laughter burst forth yet again.

Her eyes widened in shock and her jaw dropped slightly as his awestruck expression vanished only to be replaced with more laughter. "By the founder, that is it! You will tell me what is so damn funny right now."

Evron stopped his laughter and locked eyes with the child, bright blue meeting light green. He flashed her a shiny, white smile even as he continued to giggle. "Magic, _sure_. Why the fuck not?"


End file.
